It’s a balance I’m yet to master, how to be attached just the right amount and in the just the right ways.
I’m used to being all alone on my own frequency. Used to taking years to wind up to a point where I feel brave enough to speak my truth, only to have it land on other people as absolute nonsense. » Read more
The post It’s Not Easy to Balance Attachment and Autonomy appeared first on Poly.Land.
If it makes you uncomfortable, we can pretend it never happened.
That moment lives in a hazy part of my memory anyway. The place where things that don’t seem real when they’re happening live. Those moments when it feels like reality is shimmering.
We’re standing in my office with the door closed. » Read more
The post I May Be Polyamorous, But I’m No Homewrecker appeared first on Poly.Land.
It’s probably no surprise, but I think polyamory and other forms of consensual non-monogamy can be downright awesome.
That said, every good thing has downsides. For this article, I had conversations with four different folks who are all happily polyamorous asking the following question: What’s the worst thing about polyamory?
Here’s how it went:
Take 1: There’s a Potential For More Let Downs
“Sometimes I feel like dating multiple people is an opportunity to let more people down at once,” » Read more
The post What’s the Worst Thing About Polyamory? Four Takes appeared first on Poly.Land.
While jealousy may be a very strong emotional signal, it’s not a very specific one. As I’ve written before, it’s easy to panic when you experience jealousy, but it’s very much like a check engine light: Jealousy tells you that something is amiss but not what, exactly. And certainly how serious the issue is or how to really fix it. » Read more
The post 6 Things Jealousy Doesn’t Mean appeared first on Poly.Land.
Codependence is an overused term implying that normal partner interdependence is somehow dysfunctional.
The concept and terminology came out of the Alcoholics Anonymous movement; the addicted were seen as trapped in a web of dependency with others (their enablers, or codependents) who made excuses for and assisted the addicts in avoiding the consequences of their addiction, » Read more
The post Polyamory Helped Me Ditch Codependence and Find Healthy Interdependence appeared first on Poly.Land.
Ro and I are having dinner. Talking about on-again, off-again relationships. Ones where the general shape of them look like a heartbeat on an EKG. A quick spasm of highs and lows, highs and lows.
“That’s not how mine look at all,” Ro says. She explains that hers are more of a line that goes up gradually but pretty much consistently. » Read more
The post When It Comes to the Olympics of Love, I May Have Switched Sports appeared first on Poly.Land.