Tag Archives: Kink

What Does It Mean to Be a Credit to Your Kink?

I’m not sure exactly where I heard it first, but it was all the rage during the first year or two after I joined FetLife: “Be a credit to your kink.”

Practically everyone was writing about it back then, in some way, shape, or form.

The basic premise of this catchphrase was this: If you’re doing something considered beyond the sociosexual pale,  » Read more

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Ask Page: Can He Force Me Into Mono/Poly Just Because He’s a Dominant?

Page   July 2, 2018   Comments Off on Ask Page: Can He Force Me Into Mono/Poly Just Because He’s a Dominant?

Hi Page,

I’m kind of new to this whole thing, being kinky and poly. Been talking to someone, and I have doubts. I would love to know if you could shed some light on them.

Talking to a guy right now, and he says that just because he’s a Dominant that he can go out with other submissives while he doesn’t even let me talk to other people.  » Read more

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8 Lessons That I Learned From Both Polyamory and Kink

Page   February 13, 2018   Comments Off on 8 Lessons That I Learned From Both Polyamory and Kink

I didn’t open up my marriage over a decade ago with an eye toward exploring kink. But that’s nonetheless what happened. After about a year of dating polyamorously, I eventually ended up with a girlfriend who knew some folks in the kink scene and had a strong kinky streak herself.

It was a surprising turn of events at the time.  » Read more

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Voyeurism as Exposure Therapy: How Watching Kink Scenes Made Polyamory Easier for Me

Page   December 19, 2017   Comments Off on Voyeurism as Exposure Therapy: How Watching Kink Scenes Made Polyamory Easier for Me

I’m watching them from across the room, leaning against the wall. Trying to be as unobtrusive as I can, so that I don’t spoil their energy. I’ve positioned myself so that there’s another scene partially obscuring my view: A woman pressed up against a St. Andrew’s cross, her partner flogging her back in time to the music filtering into the room.  » Read more

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The Pain Is Fine: How We Moved from Vanilla to Swirl to Chocolate Kink

Page   October 24, 2017   Comments Off on The Pain Is Fine: How We Moved from Vanilla to Swirl to Chocolate Kink

“Causing Someone Pain Is Never Okay”

“Ow,” he says.

It takes me a second to even hear that he’s said anything. We’re cuddling on his bed, and I’m so cozy and comfy that I’ve half zoned out of reality.

“C’mon, Page, move,” he says. shoving me to the side.

“Oh,”  » Read more

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The Katamari of Kink or Sickness at the Love Buffet?

Page   October 20, 2017   Comments Off on The Katamari of Kink or Sickness at the Love Buffet?

The Katamari of Kink

“The reason I’m into polyamory is because no one person could be into everything I’m into,” he says.

“Oh?”

“It’s not the whole reason I’m in the polyamory, but it’s a reason I’m into polyamory,” he clarifies.

It’s evident, the breadth of his interests.  » Read more

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Submission Gap: Masterless and Longing for Certainty

Page   August 23, 2017   Comments Off on Submission Gap: Masterless and Longing for Certainty

“Peoples once accustomed to masters are not in a condition to do without them.”

-Jean Jacques-Rousseau, Discourse on the Origin of Equality

Abusive Certainty

The thing I loved about Kurt was what scared me most about him: I never knew which version of him I was going to get.  » Read more

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PQ 8.9 — Do I believe that other people are willing to do sexual things that I’m not willing to do, and therefore my partner will like having sex with them better?

Page   June 25, 2017   Comments Off on PQ 8.9 — Do I believe that other people are willing to do sexual things that I’m not willing to do, and therefore my partner will like having sex with them better?

PQ 8.9 — Do I believe that other people are willing to do sexual things that I’m not willing to do, and therefore my partner will like having sex with them better?

*

Not willing?

No, nothing like that.

I know this may be different for a lot of people.  » Read more

The post PQ 8.9 — Do I believe that other people are willing to do sexual things that I’m not willing to do, and therefore my partner will like having sex with them better? appeared first on Poly.Land.

Ask Page: Being There While My Partner’s Conservative Family Is in Town

Page   May 2, 2017   Comments Off on Ask Page: Being There While My Partner’s Conservative Family Is in Town

Hi Page,

I need your advice. My girlfriend who is not out as kinky or poly with a Christian faith based family is scheduled to have MAJOR surgery. Her family (elderly Mother & two young adult daughters) will be in town for her surgery and recovery for a few weeks.  » Read more

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What’s Mono/Poly?: A Basic Introduction

Page   April 26, 2017   Comments Off on What’s Mono/Poly?: A Basic Introduction

I really enjoyed your recent post on viewing monogamy and polyamory as a spectrum. It made me realize I don’t know a lot about mono/poly. What are some common reasons people are in mono/poly relationships? Can it work? Can it be fair? Or does the monogamous person just suffer all the time?  » Read more

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