Tag Archives: Fetlife

What Does It Mean to Be a Credit to Your Kink?

I’m not sure exactly where I heard it first, but it was all the rage during the first year or two after I joined FetLife: “Be a credit to your kink.”

Practically everyone was writing about it back then, in some way, shape, or form.

The basic premise of this catchphrase was this: If you’re doing something considered beyond the sociosexual pale,  » Read more

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How to Meet Polyamorous People

Page   March 2, 2018   Comments Off on How to Meet Polyamorous People

I’ve been interested in polyamory for a long time, and I have a question: How do you find partners? How do you meet polyamorous people? 

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A lot of people who are looking to date polyamorously will seek out new partners via a traditional dating platform like OkCupid or Tinder.  » Read more

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PQ 10.5 — What happens if the agreement doesn’t work for my partners, or my partners’ partners?

Page   September 9, 2017   Comments Off on PQ 10.5 — What happens if the agreement doesn’t work for my partners, or my partners’ partners?

PQ 10.5 — What happens if the agreement doesn’t work for my partners, or my partners’ partners?

“If Your Calendar Shows That You’re Available, I Expect You to Be Here”

“I looked at your calendar. There wasn’t anything on it,” Michelle said.

“Ah,” I said, not sure where she was going.  » Read more

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Poly Road Testing for Responsible Travelers

Page   April 28, 2017   Comments Off on Poly Road Testing for Responsible Travelers

So You Want to Open Your Relationship, What Next?

I had read all about New Relationship Energy (NRE) before diving in to polyamory. Those new, shiny feelings that happen when you first start dating someone. When your partner feels NRE for someone new, it can be deeply terrifying. Especially when you’re new to polyamory and in a relationship that was previously monogamous and not yet Poly Road Tested.  » Read more

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What’s Mono/Poly?: A Basic Introduction

Page   April 26, 2017   Comments Off on What’s Mono/Poly?: A Basic Introduction

I really enjoyed your recent post on viewing monogamy and polyamory as a spectrum. It made me realize I don’t know a lot about mono/poly. What are some common reasons people are in mono/poly relationships? Can it work? Can it be fair? Or does the monogamous person just suffer all the time?  » Read more

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Bad Poly: A Case Study

Page   March 1, 2012   Comments Off on Bad Poly: A Case Study

How does a person who is polyamorous in spirit end up monogamous in practice? To put it mildly, I was party to some truly bad poly. And despite whose “fault” you think the whole thing was when the dust settled (I personally believe we all fucked up to varying degrees), I’m confident that everyone involved […]