Monthly Archives: November 2017

Going It Alone… Kinda: A Life Full of Love and Understanding

Page   November 29, 2017   Comments Off on Going It Alone… Kinda: A Life Full of Love and Understanding

“I’m really sorry I can’t be there,” I said to Skyspook, hugging him goodbye at the door. He looked so good in his tuxedo that I didn’t really want to let him go.

“Me, too,” he said. “I’ll text you though. Have a great time.”

“You, too,” I said, as he stepped out the door.  » Read more

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Not Just Cheating: The Other Kind of Unethical Non-Monogamy

Page   November 28, 2017   Comments Off on Not Just Cheating: The Other Kind of Unethical Non-Monogamy

“So I ran into someone you know while I was at the mall today,” my roommate Noah said.

“Oh yeah?” I said. “Who?”

He said the name of a theater director I knew. A friend of a close friend.

“Nice,” I said. “How’s he doing anyway? I haven’t talked to him in ages.”  » Read more

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The War on Christmas. Or Monogamy. Or Something.

Page   November 27, 2017   Comments Off on The War on Christmas. Or Monogamy. Or Something.

War on Christmas Lady

I can hear her coming down the hall, talking to someone on her cell phone as she walks into the office suite.

“All this so-called gender stuff hurts kids. I read that some kindergartner decided their gender was ‘tractor’ and I’m supposed to respect that?”

She doesn’t know I can hear her,  » Read more

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Identifying as a Unicorn Allowed Me to Feel Proud of Something I Grew Up Feeling Ashamed About

Page   November 20, 2017   Comments Off on Identifying as a Unicorn Allowed Me to Feel Proud of Something I Grew Up Feeling Ashamed About

“What’s a unicorn?” someone new to polyamory and its lexicon will invariably ask.

As folks pop up to answer the question, a few definitions will emerge. The most basic one is that the term “unicorn” is one that is primarily used in polyamorous circles to denote a bisexual woman who will date couples (most commonly heterosexual ones).  » Read more

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PQ 12.11 — Do I feel safe opening my heart to someone who has given the power to end our relationship to someone else?

Page   November 19, 2017   Comments Off on PQ 12.11 — Do I feel safe opening my heart to someone who has given the power to end our relationship to someone else?

PQ 12.11 — Do I feel safe opening my heart to someone who has given the power to end our relationship to someone else?

*

It’s a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don’t keep your feet, there’s no knowing where you might be swept off to.  » Read more

The post PQ 12.11 — Do I feel safe opening my heart to someone who has given the power to end our relationship to someone else? appeared first on Poly.Land.

A Geek’s Guide to Unicorn Ranching

Page   November 15, 2017   Comments Off on A Geek’s Guide to Unicorn Ranching

It started over a year ago with a letter from a reader:

Do you have any advice for couples who are about to open up their relationships? 

My partner and I are new to poly. We don’t know where to begin. We’d like to find someone to date together.  » Read more

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The Hardest Part of Opening an Existing Relationship: You Can’t Reroll Your Partner’s Stats (or Your Own)

Page   November 14, 2017   Comments Off on The Hardest Part of Opening an Existing Relationship: You Can’t Reroll Your Partner’s Stats (or Your Own)

The most difficult part of opening up a relationship is that you’re changing its terms. However, it isn’t just the adjustment stress that can accompany all change (although that can be tough). It’s also that most of the time you didn’t go into the relationship expecting it to be open. And suddenly things that never mattered,  » Read more

The post The Hardest Part of Opening an Existing Relationship: You Can’t Reroll Your Partner’s Stats (or Your Own) appeared first on Poly.Land.

I’ve Always Loved Movies About Married Couples Who Actually Like Each Other

Page   November 9, 2017   Comments Off on I’ve Always Loved Movies About Married Couples Who Actually Like Each Other

It’s a very low-key Sunday afternoon. I’m a little under the weather, recovering from a stressful work week and nursing a slight hangover. Skyspook has been out late the night before at a friend’s bachelor party.

We’re hanging out on the couch watching movies from the 80s and 90s. Taking turns making suggestions.  » Read more

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PQ 12.7 — Am I prepared to bring someone I care about (or will come to care about) into a situation where I must dump them at someone else’s will?

Page   November 5, 2017   Comments Off on PQ 12.7 — Am I prepared to bring someone I care about (or will come to care about) into a situation where I must dump them at someone else’s will?

PQ 12.7 — Am I prepared to bring someone I care about (or will come to care about) into a situation where I must dump them at someone else’s will?

*

There was a time in my life when I desperately wanted a cat, but my lease said “no pets.” So even though I really wanted to do it,  » Read more

The post PQ 12.7 — Am I prepared to bring someone I care about (or will come to care about) into a situation where I must dump them at someone else’s will? appeared first on Poly.Land.

The Shrew-Whoredog Dichotomy: Expected to Control and Motivate One’s Partner

Page   November 3, 2017   Comments Off on The Shrew-Whoredog Dichotomy: Expected to Control and Motivate One’s Partner

Reading your experiences and understanding I’m not a shrew for wanting communication and some details beforehand and he’s not a whoredog for wanting to play with every new woman he meets had seriously helped us both.

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I got this letter a while ago, and it remains one of my favorites.  » Read more

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