Monthly Archives: July 2016

The Taxonomy of Cacti

Page   July 30, 2016   Comments Off on The Taxonomy of Cacti

It’s fairly easy to generate a plethora of positive-sounding reasons why someone might be a good fit for polyamory. You could be a person who loves freely, without boundaries, secure, set on enriching your own life and as many other lives as possible through unique personal connections, intent on having myriad intense life experiences. Me? […]

No One Wants to Be the Bitter Ex

Page   July 29, 2016   Comments Off on No One Wants to Be the Bitter Ex

A fifth reason came to me as to Why So Few Polyamorists Write in Great Detail (aside from through anonymous or near-anonymous outlets, as PolyLogGal so astutely pointed out in her comments on yesterday’s post). I also thought this might be a good opportunity to talk a bit about my mistakes and times where I’ve […]

Why So Few Polyamorists Write in Great Detail

Page   July 28, 2016   Comments Off on Why So Few Polyamorists Write in Great Detail

It’s very common for polyamorous bloggers to mostly write in generalities, leave out or obscure specifics. I know personally that as much as I try to be as vivid and specific as possible (because I feel like it helps readers connect more with my experiences) that I rarely put things out publicly while I’m currently […]


Page   July 27, 2016   Comments Off on Enough

It’s a funny thing, never feeling like you’re enough. “I know I’ll lose you eventually,” I told my husband Skyspook when we first started dating, “but things are wonderful now, so I’m just going to enjoy you while I have you.” “I’m not going anywhere,” he told me. But I didn’t for a second believe […]

Unnaturally Poly

Page   July 15, 2016   Comments Off on Unnaturally Poly

A lot of my favorite poly bloggers share a similar story: They came to polyamory naturally. Monogamy just wasn’t a thing that they did well. Sure, they would try to fit themselves into that box, particularly when they came upon someone they truly cared about who expressed that exclusivity was important to them, signaled commitment. […]

Rip off the Band-Aid

Page   July 14, 2016   Comments Off on Rip off the Band-Aid

I’m often asked by people newer to poly – how do I make sure I’m never jealous or uncomfortable? The quick answer is that you don’t. When you dig into things, that’s pretty unsurprising. Anything that involves other people has the potential to have its uncomfortable moments (heck, I can be get pretty uncomfortable by […]


Page   July 13, 2016   Comments Off on Sexile/Pop-Tarts

It’s strange to admit this, but making plans to hang with a hot friend of mine, I realized that when it comes to partner selection that I put just about as much thought into what sort of metamour situation I could possibly be creating as to my level of interest in the person. It probably […]

Life in the Jealous Closet

Page   July 10, 2016   Comments Off on Life in the Jealous Closet

When I first dipped my toe into the polyamorous pool in 2009, it was to date our friend Megan with my husband Seth. Megan said she was a very low jealousy person and was not very emotional seeming in general. She was low on both positive and negative expressions in general, very even keel. It […]

Bi, Female, and Sensitive

Page   July 9, 2016   Comments Off on Bi, Female, and Sensitive

I’m a highly libidinous bisexual female. I’m also deep and sensitive. I detest small talk (going to hairdressers is a kind of banal hell unless I find a quirky one). I can’t stand people I consider “career tourists,” that go through life on a very surface level, collecting unchallenging days, avoiding growth.  Well, okay, some […]